First, let me say that catching a cheater in the act (meaning sex)
is almost impossible and something you probably don't want to put
yourself through anyway. In most cases the best you can hope for
to catch them together.
If you are using a real time GPS unit you could simply wait until
you are reasonably sure that they are together and then go find
him/her. The problem with this tactic is, what if you are wrong?
example your partner says he/she has to work late. You know,
to your hidden GPS, that he/she is at a restaurant. You decide to
confront the two of them together and go busting in ready to let
him/her know how you feel, but when you get there your partner is
there on business and you are the one that ends up getting busted.
Believe me he /she will want to know how you new where he was.
A better plan may be to send a friend that you have confided in to
check it out. Just make sure that your friend has a good reason
being there. Have a reason already worked out, don't try to make
up on the fly, he/she may see right through that.
If you are using a GPS logging device and noticed that every
Wednesday he/she goes to the same place after work you could use
same tactic with a friend. Have your friend there waiting for
That way it seems like your partner ran into your friend not the
other way around. Again make sure that your friend has a good
for being there memorized.
P.I or No P.I.
The best way to handle these situations is to have someone that
partner does not know verify that he/she is with someone else. A
private investigator would be the best choice, but expensive. A
private investigator will typically charge between sixty dollars
one hundred and fifty dollars per hour. The average for a good
is somewhere around eighty dollars an hour. Most will have a
number of hours that they charge. For example I charge seventy
dollars an hour with a ten hour minimum paid up front. There are
guarantees with a P.I. . Just because you paid them does not mean
that they can deliver any evidence. Sometimes this is the private
investigators fault and sometimes it is not. If you hire a P.I. to
follow your partner after work every night for a week, for
you could easily burn fifteen hours or more, but maybe he/she was
being good that week and did not see his/her lover. That does not
mean your partner is not cheating. It simply means that he/she was
not cheating at the times that he/she was being followed.
One way to improve your chances and save you some money would be
use a GPS logger to learn your partner's habits and figure out
the best opportunities are to catch him/her. For example your
partner a bowling league every Thursday night but you know he is
going anywhere near the bowling alley. This is when you would have
the Private investigator following, giving the P.I. the best
for success using the least amount of time. You get the idea. Use
your notes and all of the information that you have gathered to
figure out the times that your partner would probably be seeing
Give them "enough rope"
You could also create an opportunity for your partner to see the
other person. You could make plans to go out of town on "business"
or to visit relatives. When in reality you get a hotel room or
with a trusted friend. Let him/her know ahead of time so that
can make plans. If you are using the right methods you might even
know what their plans are.
You could pick a fight with him/her. During this fight try to push
the right buttons. Say things that may hurt his or her ego and
esteem. You know your partner the better than most so you will
to figure out what to say. At the end of the fight storm out
that you are going to stay at your best friend's house for the
or that you won't be home until late. The idea here is to give
him/her a window of opportunity in which to see his lover and the
need to boost his/her ego. A potential problem here may be that
partner's lover may be married or have a boyfriend and cannot get
out on that short of notice.
Tailing The Target
If you don't want to hire a private investigator you could try to
follow your partner yourself. I do not recommend this at all. It
takes years of experience to learn how to effectively tail
If you do decide to try it yourself do not use your own vehicle.
Trust me your partner will be on the lookout for any sign of you.
Renting a car may be a good option here. Cars can be rented for as
little as twenty dollars a day. If possible get a car with tinted
windows and get a car that is very common in your area. In other
words, if you live in an area where you see a lot of mid sized
sedans on the road don't rent a bright red Hummer. Your partner
surely notice that he/she is being followed. If you follow your
partner more than once rent a different car each time. Also try to
get a dark color. Dark colors tend to blend in better.
When following your partner do not get too close. Try to blend
traffic. You should almost never get directly behind them. Always
try to be safe. If you get caught at a traffic light don't run the
light. This could get you or someone else hurt or worse. It also
increases the chances of being noticed. Hopefully you will be able
to catch up when the light turns green.
As I said earlier I do not recommend following your partner
yourself. There are so many things that could go wrong. If you are
caught you will have a lot of explaining to do. If you are
successful you may loose your temper and do something that you
regret later. If you do catch them together it is almost always
better not to approach them at that time. Take some pictures of
if possible and confront your partner later. You don't want to
matters worse by doing something foolish.
I cannot emphasize enough the importance of not resorting to
physical violence. You run the possibility of having criminal
charges filed against you, an arrest record, possible jail time,
well as a fine, which will only increase your pain. IT ISN'T WORTH
Remember that most people will deny, deny, deny. Make sure that
have all of the evidence that you need before confronting your